Reality Check

Some people take a spontaneous seat-of-the-pants approach to life, while others find structure more satisfying. Personally, I find structure helpful: shopping lists, appointment calendars, journal reminders. Tools of this sort may not work perfectly, but they can help us develop a sense of control over our lives.

In fact, we might even identify ourselves as problem-solvers, based on successful problem-solving incidents in our past!

When looking for information a while ago, I phoned a local business. I wasn’t quite as prepared as I like to be.

“I don’t deserve this!” I’m sure you’ve heard it said and maybe even said it yourself. A typical context is, “I’m a good person. I don’t deserve this bad thing that’s happening to me.”

Trade-offs. In many situations, we can’t get exactly what we want; we have to choose among less-than-ideal options.

The choices that we make, both big and small, affect our lives. They contribute to whether we are reasonably satisfied or rather miserable. How do we make our choices?

Everyone has an opinion about something, and some people seem to have opinions about everything! While this can make for lively conversation, differences in opinion can also result in hard feelings.

We make decisions each day; some big, many small. Many of us like to believe that we make those decisions based on logic and facts. We weigh pros and cons and we make the best possible choice based on the information that we have at the time.

Relationships. What do you think of? Perhaps the type of relationship that springs to mind is what we call “romantic” relationships, spouses, partners, girlfriends, boyfriends, and so on. The common phrase “in a relationship” is often taken to mean you have one special person with whom you share your life, decisions and plans.

Why, oh why? Why do we do things that don’t seem to make sense? Even if you always act sensibly yourself, it’s still an interesting question. The answers could help you figure out the rest of us.

Does everybody want basically the same thing? The idea is appealing, but is it true?

Have you noticed that people sometimes make choices that don’t make sense? Maybe you’ve even done this yourself! Curious, isn’t it? We know better. Why, oh why?

Over his long career, Dr. Wm. Glasser wrote several books to describe his approach to helping people get along better and live more satisfying lives. A well-known example is, Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom.

During a New Year’s decluttering spree, I stacked objects to redirect to new homes in a pile that was way too high. What happened? It fell over. You and I both knew that would happen.

What are the odds that you’ll happen to say something encouraging to someone who could really benefit from it at that very moment?

Some folks approach the beginning of a new year as the “Season of Good Intentions.”

Have you ever bought one of those air fresheners called “new car smell”? For a few bucks, you can bask in the scent of rich leather. Or maybe it’s rich vinyl. Either way, you can experience a luxurious new car scent without the inconvenience of having to part with thousands and thousands of dollars for an actual new car.

Presents are top of mind for many at this time of year. How I look at gift-giving and gift-receiving has changed over the years, and I suspect that it may also have changed for you. As we move along in our lives, it’s no surprise that our priorities, needs, and wants change.

Encouragement makes a difference in people’s lives. OK, that may just be my opinion, but I’m sticking with it. What do you think? Do you act differently when you are feeling encouraged compared to when you are discouraged?

Post-pandemic, we’re all aware of how easy it can be to catch something nasty. Thus, we take measures to prevent getting infected. We might avoid situations where we could be exposed to disease or we might try to build up our general health. Putting in a small effort to potentially prevent a big negative outcome is a pretty good investment!

They say that it takes two to tango, but that’s not all! Lots of activities depend on co-operation, and it’s important to co-operate in many situations.

As the grey days of winter set in, spirits can turn grey too. Winter is coming; will it be a hard one or an easy one? Predictions aren’t perfect, but it’s safe to say it’ll get colder and there will probably be snow.

“How’s it going?” Has anyone asked you that recently? If so, how do you respond?

If you wanted to equip a young person with the tools they need to have a satisfying life, what would you choose?

When I recently reviewed my to-do list, I was pleasantly surprised to see that I had accomplished more than I had realized!

Have you ever heard yourself saying, “If only [fill in whatever name you like here] would behave more sensibly. If only they’d pay attention.